its been 3 months since we met Matilda today.. some days the last 3 months seem to have flown by and other days it feels like just yesterday.. i am trying notto think about the fact that today she would have been 33 weeks - i can remember how i had imagined this day would feel when she was still with us.. i imagined that i would be running around at work finishing things off.. organising things for her homecoming... getting last minute xmas presents sorted because i knew i wouldnt have much time after her birthday.. sigh..
instead i am sitting here on the couch.. wishing i was being kicked from the inside and that there was something jiggling in my tummy.. i am glad i am not at work today - i dont think i would have been able to focus on anything..
a few weeks ago was infant loss rememberance day.. i cant believe there has to be such a day.. i cant believe there are so many people who have been in the exact same spot as i have.. its not fair.. not for any of us..
i have decided to get a tattoo in honour of my baby girl... i think i will do that soon..
we have also started trying for a sibling for matilda.. but to no avail.. yet! we've only tried for one cycle though...
i miss you today like i miss you everyday Tilly Bear!
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