Happy Birthday Oliver

The 30th July was Oliver's second birthday - how much I wish this little guy was here on earth with his parents.

I didn't find out about Oliver until after Matilda was born. Oliver's dad works with me and has been an amazing source of support since i returned to work - initially when i was new to baby loss and now that im in the world of rainbow babies.

I do hope Oliver had a nice birthday where ever he was. I hope he has found my Matilda and they play together everyday and keep each other company. He is a lucky boy to have such a fantastic family!

Happy Birthday little man! xxx

Soapbox moment...

please excuse my rant... let me begin by saying that perhaps i feel this way because i don't have a living baby in my life.. as yet none of my friends have babies and so i guess i've just never been in a position to understand the following...

why do people choose to describe babies as angels... ie.. a face book announcement welcoming the "most precious little angel so and so arrived today etc etc etc" when i see these my immediate reaction is to say congratulations but your baby really isnt an angel and for that you must be ever grateful... alas.. i refrain...

i am not religious, but i went to a catholic school and i suppose my definition of "angel" is formed based on my religious education.. so basically.. an angel is someone who has died.. i guess that is why i hate seeing that word being used to describe living babies/children..

if anyone has any insights that may make me more comfortable with this word association i would love to hear it.. or am i alone on this?

11 months today

I cant believe that you are nearly 1 year old my little bear. You should have been 7 months... you should have been in your bassinet next to me... some days i find it hard to believe you are mine and that we actually met... other days i feel like someone has ripped my heart out and that we met just yesterday...

thank you for looking after your baby brother.. i know you are looking out for him..  know that we will never forget you and he will always know about you, his big sister and how awesome you were.

I haven't worked out what we are going to do for your birthday yet. Im going to send you up some balloons so keep an eye out for them.

I hope you have found tilly who is nearly 1 too and also little oliver - he will be two on the 30th July. I wish i could be there to take you to your friends birthday parties and i also wish your friends didn't have to be without their parents on their birthdays..

i miss you poppet. i love you forever!

xx